On the dawn of being a parent to adults

On this day 20 and then again 18 years ago, I became a father.  So as of today, officially / legally I am a father of adults, rather than children.  While I expect it might take me a while to stop talking to people about how my “kids” are doing, the fact is that you have both been on the path to adulthood for a long time now.  Looking back, it’s clear to me now that I actually didn’t become an adult fully until your mother and I became responsible for the two of you.  Maybe I’m still not fully an adult?

On this special occasion for all of us, I wanted to take the time to write down what’s on my mind and a few wishes for you as you live the rest of your lives as adults.

First off, try your best to keep the best of your child hood: the curiosity you each meet the world with, your kind nature and most of all your deep friendship with each other.

Next, leave the necessary, but unpleasant aspects of childhood behind: the petty jealously, the need to fit in and go along with the crowd and certainly the lack of self assurance and self esteem.

Being a parent to adults doesn’t end the worries of parenthood.  I worry that I haven’t done enough to prepare you, but then I see how well adjusted you are and that vanishes.  I worry that I will loose my relationship with you, but then I find myself deep in a conversation and know that we’ll always be able to talk with each other.  I worry most of all about what the world will bring you, but then I am calmed by the knowledge of what you will bring to the world.

You are each the greatest achievement of my life and I am thankful to have played a small part in who you are and am more excited than anything to be able to see who you will become.

2 Replies to “On the dawn of being a parent to adults”

  1. Beautiful post! You will probably never stop referring to Kendall and Mason as your “kids”. Not a bad thing.

  2. Very very well thought out post. I know that’s pretty much how I felt with you and Amy, but had nowhere to express it to the world. You and Deanna have done a fabulous job raising your children to adulthood and no it does not change how you feel about them. Love you son and your contribution to the future with Kendall & Mason.

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